Osm and a Half

Today is Ben's half-birthday. Last July -- in the midst of us packing our belongings, prepping the house for renters, and remodeling the bathroom -- Ben turned eight (“osm” in Czech, which sounds more than a little like “awesome”).

Ben took the chaos in stride, even chose a celebration at an amusement park with the family and his lifelong friend, Nate, over a big birthday party. Which was delightful for us: more fun, less work.

Benjamin Harold showed us right from the start that hurrying was not his style. He was born 16 days after his “due” date following a labor that culminated in five and a half hours of pushing.

(pause for groan)

Ben arrived in the center of a circle of women cheering and encouraging me to Get This Baby OUT! Karl, every bit as eager as the ladies, was much less demonstrative until Ben was born -- then he wept openly with the rest of us.

Upon arrival, Ben grimaced and blinked at the light, looked around to determine what just happened, and then snuggled into my arms. (To this day there are mornings when I wake him up and, looking at his face, think his mannerisms haven't changed all that much since that hot summer day in Seattle.) For a brief moment he seemed slightly put out to have been disturbed, but then he exuded a presence of calm and belonging, as if he couldn't imagine being anywhere else, doing anything other than gazing into his parents' eyes.

He was the most gorgeous creature I'd ever seen.

Though we've never visited the internal world of Ben's mind, we do get amazing postcards and dispatches. Ben has a mind-boggling ability to grasp concepts and commit facts to memory. Over pancakes this morning, Karl and the boys were discussing the latest Večerníček series, Říkání o víle Amálce, or the Stories of Amalka the Fairy. Karl mentioned that víla (with an accent on the “i”) meant fairy or sprite but vila (no accent) meant country residence or villa. Ben drew a quick in-breath as his head snapped up.

“Oh! So that show we saw advertised last month was really called 'Winter Fairy' not 'Winter Villa'!” Ben remarked.

With his head slightly cocked and his gaze drifting up and into the distance, Karl smiled and nodded at having his son correct his Czech translation.

Ben's vocabulary has always been way beyond his years. At four, Ben regularly used words like “rather” and “whereas.” Correctly. Which reminds me -- he was also a bit of an adverb junkie, peppering his commentary with adamant exclamations of “Actually!” and “Surprisingly” and “Disappointingly ….” This sounded all the more out of place before he learned how to say “L” and “R”. ("suh-pwising-wee...")

But if Ben is known for anything, it's his love of reading. One of the journal prompts his class had in kindergarten read: “If I could spend the night at school, I would want to stay in ______ because _______.” It was no surprise to anyone when Ben wrote “I would want to stay in the library, because then I could read books all night!” In every classroom situation since preschool, Ben's teachers have adored his passion for books. Until they don't.

“It's becoming a problem,” the teacher would say, usually about three months into the school year. “I've never said this before, but I really want Ben to choose an activity other than reading or looking at books during free-choice time.”

We heard some version of this in preschool, kindergarten, and first grade. The teachers, confident in Ben's comfort with and interest in books, wanted to make sure that his social development progressed along with his reading ability.

(Thus far, Ben's current teacher, Miss Logan, is in the adoration phase.)

Not that Ben doesn't love all the regular things that kids love: climbing trees, laughing at poop jokes, building with Legos, playing games on the playground, and running races. He always wants us to devise a race course and time him running it. And he's pretty fast, too … when he wants to be. His friend Alex –– who's an incredible athlete –– once noted, “Ben's a really fast runner. But he's a really sloooow walker!”

Long fascinated by science, Ben is our go-to guy when it comes to anything regarding dinosaurs, space, or the world around him.

His thirst for knowledge keeps us on our toes. Back in Oneonta Karl was preparing a bath for Ben one night when Ben asked, "What's sex?"

Karl stammered for only a moment before responding, "Well, that's what animals do when they mate. That's how babies are made. It's how mammals make babies, including humans."

Karl's satisfaction at meeting the question head on was deflated as soon as Ben presented the follow up:

"What's amazing sex?"

The next week It's So Amazing arrived in the mail from Amazon, and Ben delved into it eagerly.

(And, parents? Let this be a cautionary tale of what can happen when you leave The New Yorker on the back of the toilet.

This is the cover that inspired Ben's query.)

It would be hard to quantify all the ways that Ben has matured this year. He's more open to trying new foods, and he doesn't complain throughout a less favorite dish (that was a major milestone). He demonstrated new depths of strength and grace in facing the school challenges of this year. And his sense of contentment has grown as well. Though he's not particularly comfortable in front of the camera, I see it in some pictures –– a softened face, a confident presence.

It has been a delight to show Ben the fun of exploration and discovery in our travels. His sense of wonder, his ability to make connections, and enthusiasm for learning enrich us all.

We love our eight year old! Simply put, he's awesome. And a half.

A Grand Day Out, Flat Stanley style

Last week we opened a thick envelope that arrived from Oneonta and out poured Flat Stanley, along with his diary, a bunch of letters, and some pictures. Flat Stanley is a character in a children's book who experiences different adventures because of his unique shape. In one story he visits California via the postal system. Ben's class from home is doing the Flat Stanley project (in which kids send Flat Stanleys all over the world), and Alex, one of Ben's best buddies, chose to send Flat Stanley to Prague.

What a treat for Ben to receive all of these handmade letters from his friends! His school “loops” grades for two years, so the classmates and teachers he had last year for first grade class are still together this year for second grade.

Sunday we had a gift of a day weather-wise -- clear skies and about 12 degrees C/mid-50s F. Since Flat Stanley arrived without a jacket, we knew he would appreciate the warmer temperatures.

We covered a lot of territory.

Here are Ben and Flat Stanley in front of a typical city tram. To get around town we take the tram, bus, or the subway.

Ben and Flat Stanley on the west side of Karlův most (Charles Bridge), in front of the Malostranské mostecké věže (Smaller Side bridge towers). The bridge is one of Prague's most famous landmarks. It was built starting in 1357 on the 9th of July at 5:31am, recognized as an auspicious time for its palindromic quality: 135797531. Thirty statues of saints line the sides of the bridge.

Flat Stanley poses on Kampa Island, with the high waters of Vltava River behind him. We had a week of warm temperatures which led to a quick melt off and flooding in some areas. Charles Bridge and the east side of the river are in the distance.

On the No. 9 tram -- Flat Stanley takes in the scenery while Ben reads.

Flat Stanley (supported by Garrett) and Ben pose in Václavské náměstí, or Wenceslas Square. Wenceslas Square was first established in the 1300s as a horse market. It has been the site of many political demonstrations through the years, including the 1989 Velvet Revolution when up to 500,000 people protested the communist rule of then Czechoslovakia.

The big building at the top of the square is the Národní muzeum (National Museum). We like visiting the museum on the first Thursday of the month, when then there is no entrance fee. There's a fun exhibit there now on Czech legends.

Ben, Garrett, and Flat Stanley under the statue of Sv. Václav (St. Wenceslas), the patron saint of the Czech lands. This the same guy from the Christmas carol "Good King Wenceslas."

Ben and Flat Stanley brace themselves for the rush of air pushed by the subway!

We climbed the Staroměstská mostecká věž (Old Town bridge tower -- the one seen in the picture of Flat Stanley on Kampa). Flat Stanley enjoyed amazing views of Charles Bridge and its many statues, the Vltava River, Mala Strana (Small Side), and Pražský hrad (Prague Castle).

Flat Stanley with Sir Garrett inside the bridge tower.

Flat Stanley soaks up the sun on Charles Bridge (and observes Prague Castle from a new perspective).

It was a very exciting day, and we'd worked up a good appetite. Fortunately we had reservations at Výtopna Restaurant because the boys had earned another reward dinner. Flat Stanley was excited to hear there were trains closer to his size.

We placed our drink order and pretty soon we saw the beverage locomotive chugging toward us.

At the end of the meal, another train arrived to clear our glasses and bottles.

“THAT was awesome!” Garrett and Ben proclaimed as we left Vytopna.

Flat Stanley was speechless in his delight. He will be heading home soon with his diary, some pictures, and a lot of lovely memories. We were so happy to have his company. Thank you, Alex!



Parting shot: like any city, Prague has its oddities. Here's something you can partake in when next you find yourself on Wenceslas Square:

Exfoliation by sucker fish

Personally, I was pleased to have already eaten my dinner. Because this

would have left me with little appetite.

Ahoj!

Henry Goes to Prague

Our hometown, Oneonta, is small. Mayberry-esque, if you will. Main Street today in fact is quite similar to its 1950s photo above. But just because Sheriff Taylor wouldn't be out of place here doesn't mean everyone knows everyone in town.

While I would have met my friend Adrienne at some point (our kids are very close in age, they live less than a mile away), a random coincidence and the internet brought us together sooner rather than later.

I've read Katie Allison Granju's blog, now called mamapundit, for about six years. Katie, who lives in Knoxville, Tennessee, is a “mom-blogger” and the author of Attachment Parenting. Not surprisingly she often comments on issues regarding breastfeeding, birthing, and parenting, topics I follow closely for personal and professional reasons. Coincidentally, I attended college with Katie although I didn't know her then. I still don't know her, but sometimes I feel like I do.

Adrienne, also an author (Hillbilly Gothic: A Memoir of Motherhood and Madness and Sweater Quest: My Year of Knitting Dangerously) and a blogger, moved to Oneonta from Knoxville where she knew and began a friendship with Katie. They belong to a group of writer moms who provide feedback, support, and networking connections for each other.

Going through Katie's blogroll one day I happened upon Adrienne's blog, martinimade, which I was startled to learn was written right around the corner. Adrienne, an avid knitter, often posts about her handmade creations. When I started following, she was taking a stab at sewing. So to speak.

She posted about a skirt she made and included a picture of herself (from the waist down) in the skirt.

A week later I was at church and heard a baby squawk. I turned toward the noise and the flurry of movement to see … the skirt.

“That there's Adrienne Martini,” I thought to myself. An introduction and sheepish acknowledgment (i-read-your-blog-and-i-recognized-your-skirt …) had us both chuckling. Here's A's take on the whole encounter, btw.

That was almost five years ago. Last Thursday Adrienne and her family left after spending a week with us in our apartment in Prague. Talk about taking it to the next level.

All of this is background for what follows.

Last April, Katie Allison Granju's eldest son, Henry, was hospitalized after a drug overdose and brutal assault. He died five weeks later. It's a horrifying and heartbreaking story that Adrienne and I followed along with thousands of others online through Katie's almost daily blog updates during that time. Henry's story, and Katie's story, is difficult but important to read, especially for parents. If you want to read it -- I encourage you to -- start here.

Katie with Henry at Christmas a few years ago

On the day of Henry's memorial service, another writer friend of Katie's, Ayun Halladay, organized  folks to send Katie “With You in Spirit” pictures. Katie's friends photographed posters and signs with Henry's name all over the place. They held up “Henry” signs in front of the New York city skyline and at Red Rocks Amphitheater in Colorado. They wrote “Henry” in the sand near the surf and formed his name in rocks at the mountains.

Blog readers began following suit and sending "With You in Spirit" pictures from all over the world. And these pictures have become incredibly special to Henry's mom and dad and their families. As Katie wrote, “Henry was only 18, so there is so much he had yet to see when he died, but these photos are taking him so many places he would have wanted to go.”

Given our connection to Katie's web site, Adrienne and I knew we wanted to honor Henry during Adrienne's trip to Prague.

Our elder children helped us out. A's daughter, Maddy, wrote Henry's name in block letters. And Ben decorated the sign in cheerful colors.

Here is Henry in front of the Jindřišská věž, (Saint Henry's Tower).

Jindřišská věž was built between 1472 and 1475 as part of the Church of Saint Henry which already had a spire but did not have walls strong enough to support the weight of the bells. And so the Saint Henry Tower was built. It is the tallest bellfry in Prague.

We send our heartfelt thoughts and virtual hugs to Katie, Chris, Jon, Melissa, Jane, Elliot, Charlotte, Georgia, and all of Henry's family. We know this post and the pictures cannot diminish the pain, but we hope that you'll feel the comfort of a caring community that remembers Henry.

~ Kate & Adrienne

More Oneontans Abroad

Many friends threatened to visit us during our time in Prague, but none showed more clarity of intention to follow through on that threat than my friend Adrienne. Adrienne addressed passport issues (updating hers and hubby's, applying for the kiddos') before we even had the official word that Karl would be granted the year off for sabbatical, heck before we even dealt with our passport issues! (Maybe we should have delegated the visa application to A?)

So like a late Christmas present -- one we were all eager to receive -- Adrienne, Scott and kiddos arrived on December 29th.

Can two families of four survive a week of togetherness in a city apartment with one toilet? The answer is yes! Well, actually, the answer is I don't know. We had a mid-week break during which both families ran in opposite directions overnight for a breather. Nevertheless, we were delighted to host friends for the New Year's holiday.

We hit a lot of Prague's usual suspects vis-à-vis Must See Sights.

Cory, Maddy, Garrett, and Ben huddle up in front of St. Vitus Cathedral at Prague Castle.

We had kids and it was cold, so we availed ourselves of an indoor exhibit appropriate for the 8-and-under set: the Toy Museum, housed (incongruously) at the castle. It boasts a huge Barbie collection. Here are a few that caught my eye.

Pregnancy Barbie. How did I miss this when I was looking for props to teach childbirth ed classes?

For my UT pals, the Vols are represented, along with the rest of the orange and white college squads, in cheerleader Barbies.

Interesting to note that the Three Stooges were exhibited between American presidents Clinton and George W. Bush. Moe is caught here trying to give Bill bunny ears for the shot.

Tippi Hedren Barbie keeps her cool as Hitchcock's Birds descend.

Christmas markets were still in swing for New Year's, so we went to Old Town Square on the afternoon of the 31st to soak up the atmosphere. And a little warm medovina (mead). Yum.

Maddy, Garrett and Ben in front of the Church of Our Lady Before Tyn.

The grown ups enjoyed a late afternoon performance of The Messiah, leaving all four kids with our babysitter, Ester, bless her. We cornered the children and promised all kinds of bodily harm and loss of privileges if they dare not listen to Ester (who's command of English is tenuous).

The Messiah was enjoyable, although we found it strangely anti-climactic to not stand for the Hallelujah chorus. (Apparently it's not done in non-English speaking countries.) We walked back through Old Town Square in the evening on our way to the metro. It was lovely and picturesque. I'm sure the scene was a bit more raucous four or five hours later.

We did not venture out for the fireworks -- in fact, only a couple of us were awake at midnight -- but that didn't mean we didn't get a show. Czechs love firing off their own explosives. Here are some that were set off in Pushkin Square, just the other side of our block.

On New Year's day we went to the Prague Zoo, a favorite haunt of ours, and learned that the flamingos truly drew a short stick when it came to zoo locales.

Down time for kiddos at the apartment mostly consisted of fantasy scenarios, playing on the computer, and watching DVDs, but we did have one crafty activity up our sleeves in candle-decorating. Garrett and Maddy showed the most interest and created some cool candles.

Finally, a picture of the grown ups. Scott, Adrienne, Karl and I again threw Ester to the wolves and went out to a pub on the last night of the visit. We had to keep the evening rather tame, what with a taxi scheduled to pick upat 5am.

It was so good to have you guys with us! Thank you, thank you for following through and making that trip across the pond. We loved showing you Prague. Maybe we can do it again in another seven years?

... and I definitely think we should look into communal living. Much easier to have more parents and more playmates in house, full time.

Křivoklát Castle

Šťasný nový rok! (Happy New Year!) House guests, holidays, and kids on school break have kept me from the blog. I've got a backlog (would that be a klog?) of posts building. Since the boys returned to school today, I finally have a little time to catch up.

Colder weather has kept us from making day trips to the country as our interests are usually of the outdoor variety. But the weather took a turn for the better over the weekend, and we decided to visit Hrad Křivoklát (Křivoklát Castle). We caught a fast train to Beroun and then got on this cute little local to head to the site. I took this picture just as we realized that we got off the train one stop too early.

Oops.

No matter. It was a clear day with temps in the low 40s F/5 C. Momentarily stalled, we set out for a three-kilometer walk on a well-maintained trail.

With temperatures suddenly well above freezing, rivers have been much higher than usual, and there is some concern of flooding. Perhaps you can see how high the Berounka is in the distance.

It ran fast and carried lots of ice and debris. All heading to the Vltava. And Prague.

Off to storm the castle.

Our first full glimpse of Křivoklát!

Built in the 12th century, Křivoklát was the childhood home of Charles IV (of Charles Bridge and Charles University fame). Originally a hunting residence for royals, it ultimately became a royal prison.

Přízraky Křivoklátska (Phantoms of Křivoklát) ~ with a history as a royal prison, there are going to be a few ghost stories to tell.

Karl and Garrett took a tour of the interior while Ben and I hung out in the courtyard, playing and reading. Garrett was most taken with the stories of branding people with hot coals (ew) and the hunger chamber, a deep well-like structure that prisoners were lowered into to die. Like I said, ghost stories.

Afterward we walked to town, had a snack at the local pub,

and caught the next train home.